Friday, August 1, 2008

Friday's Funnies

The other day when I was describing how funny Jim and I look together, (post – Look Beyond The Fault), it made me think about how much my body has changed over the years. One of those changes is my breasts. When I was younger they were so “perky” that if I didn’t wear a bra they still “pointed” north. Now they have gone to the Deep South! Yes ladies, if I wear one of those “sexy” gowns my boobs hang to my waist! I need a push bra or a mini fork lift! Lol. The other day I laid down and thought someone had stolen my breasts until I wondered what those lumps were under my armpits – Oh, there’s my breasts! My mom has said, “Getting old is not for wimps!” How true! You have to a sense of humor as you mature in age. So enjoy the pics… have a good laugh..






IN MEMORY AND HONOR OF MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS WHO HAVE LOST OR WON THE BATTLE OF BREAST CANCER PLEASE CLICK ON THIS BUTTON TO HAVE YOUR CLICK COUNT TO FIGHT BREAST CANCER.
The Breast Cancer Site


MAMMOGRAM PRACTICE EXERCISES

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there’s no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam, and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And you can do this right in your own home!

Exercise 1:
Open the refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds (while you hold your breath). Repeat again, in case the first time wasn’t effective enough.

Exercise 2:
Visit your garage at 3:00am when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast.

Exercise 3:
Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next week and o it again1

CONGRATULATIONS!
Now you have nothing at all to worry about when you go for your Mammogram!

PLEASE GET YOU MAMMORGRAM AND DO YOUR SELF EXAMS REGULARLY

4 comments:

Lady of Value said...

Oh how true!! What a great post, so funny! I do agree, getting older is no fun - but a good sense of humor makes it bearable right?

Marsha said...

Just had my mammo this week....always fun! haha

Denise said...

You are so funny sweetie.

Missy said...

I think I have 2 more years. Great...can't wait...what fun...and not really something you want anybody coming to hold your hand through either!